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Criminal Jagoffs

What Can $1,000,000 Buy You?

WOW! Does this guy make Western Pa’ers look like we’re all stupid or does he make us all look like GENIUSES for not being him?

Joe Lombardi, a 23 year-old and, OBVIOUS covert operations MASTERMIND, walked into a Sharpsville, PA FoodMart store to purchase herbal potpourri (fake pot). He used a fake $1,000,000 bill!!! As a matter of fact, he threw the fake money on the counter, grabbed the fake pot and ran out the REAL door of the store. (No reports yet on whether or not he used a fake Handicap tag to keep a getaway car close at hand.)

(Full story on WTAE-TV Website)

Cuz that’s the FIRST thing that would go through your mind if you had a single piece of currency actually worth $1,000,000 – “Let me go to the local FoodMart and get some $4.99 pot-pourri and a Mallow Bar with this.  Then I’ll live FOREVER off of the change I get back!!”  I think I’d be more like, “I better put this in a good investment like my Christmas Club account!”

I would love to see this guy win the lottery or Publisher’s Clearing House and watch’em drag that HUUUUGE check into the bank for cashing!!  Sticking his toungue out and all while he’s endorsing the back with a big green Crayon. 

Hey Sharpeville-Kingping Joey, even I know that if ya wanted to use a $1,000,000 bill, you should go to a Macy’s, AT LEAST.  Some advice, the next time you have a $1,000,000 bill in your possession, consider how you can REALLY be successfull with it –  buy houses/hotels for your Broadway and Park Place properties!  They are located right next to the “GO” space on the Monopoly board.  As they always say, “drugs can Kill Ya” or at THE VERY least they can embarrass the @#$ out of ya nationally, Ya Jagoff!!

 

AUTHOR’S HINT:  Joe, just in case you do get change the next time, ask for it in all quarters.  Then go to Downtown Pittsburgh. 

You’ll be able to park for about half-a-day this holiday weekend on that!

 

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