Ten Lies I’ve Told at Concerts

If you’re on Facebook, you know that there has been “a thing” of everyone posting 10 concerts that they have attended and one of them is a lie.  You have to figure out which one is the lie.  The unofficial campaign has been going on for so long that, 97% of the country (that is on Facebook) should be getting pretty good at spotting lies… kind of at a “Criminal Minds” level of expertise.

So, I’ve decided to change it up a bit and list 10 lies that I have told while at or about a concert.  As you’ll see, some of them include invoking the “I’m a parent and it’s best to lie for right now” rule from page 38 of the parent manual.

“They were sold out. I didn’t even get one for ME!”

When I forgot to purchase a concert ticket for a friend, only purchased 3 vs. 4 so then 3 of us had to lie about what we did that night.

“They were all out of those lighted, spinny things by the time I got to the counter.”

Disney Concert (“I’m a parent and it’s best to lie for right now” rule) and the lighted, spinny thing was $18 and I had 2 kids

“I went but I hated it.”

Osmond Brothers’ concert… my first concert ever with my older sister; said after I made the mistake of telling my friends that I went.

“He’s super talented.”

About a Bob Dylan concert when we were hanging out with some girls from college who said they thought he was a genius.

“Oh yeah!  I’ve seen him twice!”

ALSO, about a Bob Dylan concert when we were hanging out with some girls from college who said they thought he was a genius and we were getting ever-so-close to going home with them.

“Those tickets in the front row are given to poor children who don’t have parents.”

Said at a Barney the Dinosaur show when my kids were crying that we could barely see him on stage and I refused to pay the $$ to get tickets other than peanut heaven.

“This is ANOTHER one of those concerts where they give the front tickets to poor children who don’t have parents.”

Said at a Wiggles concert to my kids.  Invoking the parent rule here too because this was only 3 months after dumping a wad on the previously listed Barney show.

“Yes I was here the entire time! It was great!”

Said to my kids at one of their kindergarten band concerts when I had sneaked out to catch a listen to a Pens playoff game with some other dads.

“My phone crapped out.  As a matter of fact, I heard that the network got struck by lightning and was down all night.”

Said to my friend, in lie #1, who had been trying to get in touch with me about hanging out since, “we hadn’t been able to get tickets to the concert.”

I didn’t have that much to drink.

Not sure which concert this was but, I’m sure that I said this and then drove home.. which was indicated by the side-view mirror missing from my car and the tree branches stuck in the door handle.

That’s it!  Go have fun posting your 10 concert lies and things, Ya Jagoffs!

 

Holla aht to Team Rach for the Monday Motivation